Marilyn Monroe

Louise Erdrich, The Painted Drum

(Source: -theperfectmistake, via sayonarasupergirl)

(Source: wwwfashonlifelovemusic, via sayonarasupergirl)

sayonarasupergirl:

-Effy 

sayonarasupergirl:

olvidare:

untitled by `yatender on Flickr.

Trust isn’t just about the faith that the other won’t cheat. Trust is in the knowledge that the other person will be there for you regardless of your mood. That he will take you into his arms when you’re feeling under the weather, not say anything, and just hold you in the reassurance of his love. I needed that today. 

if that is trust, then i have always trusted you to be there for me. but how many times do i need to have my heart broken for a hug when im down?

Its the one night in many nights that i would lie in bed and cry. Not because i was angry, or because i was being overly dramatic, but because i had just realised that every time i expected something, i would be let down. Maybe i just expect too much from an ordinary human being. Maybe expecting shouldn’t even exist. It is too much to ask?

I am someone who feels that family is important. Maybe its because family to me is something i always lacked. And i love family outings, gatherings, etc. But maybe family to you, is nothing like it means to me. I want someone who’d love me, and love my family. It is bad that every time there is a festive season, we’d have a problem. Why? Because i expect that holidays are meant to be spent together with people i, you, we love? Maybe love is different in everyone’s eyes. My love to my family is something that i dont speak of verbally, but i rather silently anticipate the next gathering. Family is the only group of people that will never leave you, in my case. 

Time after time i anticipate the day we would meet, time and time again i break down once it passes 10 in the evening and what happens next? A big fight? Then what, i let it go, let it rest, put up some excuse, listen to some excuse, accept some excuse. But maybe they arent excuses but are actually the perception of somebody else. What is supposed of me may not be supposed of you. How much, can a girl take before she realises that hey. Maybe we may be similar in many ways, but it comes down to the tiny tiny things that matters the most to me. The small act of appearing, on chinese new year, reunions, games, gatherings, love. Showing respect to the one woman i love with all my heart, who has been so nice to you all this while, being on your side fighting for your case when her daughter is sitting in front of her crying because of you. 

I may not be respectful to ALL elders, but i know who i love and should treasure and respect, and she sure is one of them. But i guess you dont see it. I guess everyone else but you sees it. Because all there is to you, is a silent war, where you arent ready to say something, arent ready to do anything. Maybe there isnt a time to be ready. Its now or never. Because im tired, im so tired of trying to wait. So tired of waiting for you to be here for me, claiming you dont want me to be alone. You dont want to say something you’d regret. Hey guess what, ive been alone all this time and where were you? 

I realised, that all this while i thought you loved me somehow, through the nice days at least. But maybe you really didnt love me at all. Because no matter how bad the fight, you wouldnt even try to give it a shot and resolve it, instead of hiding behind technology and your phone. No matter how many times we discussed it, no matter how many fights we had over the same issue. Its just too much to take.